A FOURTH-GRADER at Charlotte Lennox Elementary School was suspended indefinitely for violating the school’s zero-tolerance weapons policy. Security guards found a sharp object in the student’s backpack during a routine interrogation and strip-search. Vice-Principal Wilmot Baldridge told reporters that the object appeared to be a pencil. Although no final decision has been reached on the disposition of the unnamed student, Mr. Baldridge said that, in the past, the school district has had some success rehabilitating similar cases in summer reeducation camps.

Published in: on April 12, 2011 at 11:31 am  Comments (2)  

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  1. At the Alfred Nobel School for the Mentally Advanced they’ve been catching 8th graders with sharp wits, and detaining 9th graders for cutting remarks.

  2. It is reported that this weapon bore a serial number 2, thus implying the existence of at least one other similar weapon. An extensive search is underway.

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