READING TEA LEAVES.

DID YOU KNOW that the leaves in the bottom of your teacup can read the future wherever you have access to a 3G data connection? Simply look for these patterns in the leaves, and refer to this guide for the proper interpretations.

Necklace—Partial: Danger of losing a lover. Complete: Likelihood of hanging.

Hat: Look in your pockets. You may have lost your mittens.

Pear: Expect misfortunes in twos. Tea leaves are notoriously poor at spelling.

Acorn: Large deciduous tree within twenty years.

Shoe: You will be heckled by an angry mob.

Face of James Buchanan: Your friends are treacherous, indolent, or stupid.

Asterisk: See note, next teacup.

Pig: Bacon in your near future.

Triangle: You will perform the least rewarding part in the symphony. Not necessarily metaphorical.

Brooklyn Bridge: Outstanding investment opportunity in tea-shop franchising. Inquire at counter.

Hourglass: Teacup is not responding. Empty and refill to reboot.

Published in: on March 18, 2011 at 8:14 pm  Comments (3)  

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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Too funny!

  2. “The giant, spectral dog that haunts churchyards! My dear boy, it is an omen—the worst omen—of death!”

  3. […] MARCH, we learned about Reading Tea Leaves. For our canine readers, we also presented A Trivia Quiz for Your […]


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