INVITE YOUR LOCAL symphony to rehearse Tchai­kovsky’s 1812 Overture in your attic.

Start melting the snow with a hair dryer. By April or May, the snow will be gone!

Fit a broom to the landing gear of a remote-controlled model airplane.

Tell the neighborhood children that there’s pirate treasure buried somewhere under all that snow. Make them promise they won’t go up on your roof to try to find it.

Set up a trampoline in your attic, put on a football helmet, and bounce as high as you can.

Turn the house over and shake vigorously. If that doesn’t work, shake the house vigorously.

Published in: on February 4, 2011 at 10:03 am  Leave a Comment  

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